the day the women rose
the day the woman rose
she walked with grace
and calm
peace spread across her face
and she said
let's sit down 
and eat

together

what is it in stillness that we fear?
 the sound of our own heart beating?
 the wave of emotions that is like an avalanche every second of every day? 
the rhythmic pattern of thoughts that bang against our skulls day in and day out? 
what keeps us from silence...
what keeps us from peace?

i like to be cold,
slightly drunk
sleepy
and curl up next to
someone i love

nothing is the way i want it to be
try to find the zen in that
yet everything is
IS
or it never was
or it was never meant to be

goddess warriors vs, goatfuckers

the ring reeks with the stench 

of dirty old men

consumed by power, domination, control

religion is dealt the hand of referee

but there is no neutrality here

that, at least, is transparent

my weapon is my truth

and i will wield it wisely yet sharply

and with precision, integrity and fearlessness

my actions have cast light on the stage

and now it's time to ACT

i've been staring 
at the hair on my arm
for about an hour now
and what i have discovered
is that there is extreme beauty
in our diversity
if only we could see it
outside of our arm hair
that may sound crazy
but it really isn't if you stare long enough

once you were my window to the world
and then you slammed it on my fingers
amazing to me
how long it takes
to heal a broken finger

i'm voting for love today
i'm choosing joy
and anarchy and
community
today i vote for my self
and your self
and the goddess
and the universe
and mercury in retrograde
and the solstice
and pizza
i'm voting for love today

for every line we draw

for every time we feel our breath

next to our lover's sweet body

for every moment we feel our breath

leave our belly

for every minute we are alive

for every love, 

every moment

every gift

for every kid we try to save

for every mother addicted to the street

for every boy who can't take his eyes off the screen

for our miserable planet

for my own weeping eyes

i give thanks

and remember to breathe

the wounds you left
so deep in my heart
are portals to my soul

somewhere in the grains of time
my voice got sucked into the depths of death
i am dying a marvelous death
also living an incredible life
watching, listening, waiting
for our new reality to emerge
also creating it in my own fashion
community, love, connection
love
oh did i already say love?
yes to love

i am storming in my sleep
and the devil is upon me
i cry as much as i laugh
and i laugh a lot
i wonder when my soul
will be free
or what else must be done
to set me free
like what do i have to fucking do????
my heart knows the answer

dear cab 118
i saw you even though you didn't see me
you were staring straight ahead
and you didn't move a muscle
as you clenched the wheel

when i saw you i wondered what you were thinking
are you angry?
sad?
what country are you from?
i'm sorry canada's government is a cocksucker

feeling displaced
and i haven't even left
roads drifting away
where is my home

this liberation
of my heart
is a delicate reminder
of our creative impulse
to evolve

our drive for connection
RE connection
and the mountainous journey
of the soul

happiness is.
happiness is.

the day i met you
i smiled
and the sweet radiance of
YOU
entered my being
our life is too short
to waste on anything
but that

this is a message from my heart
this is a call to the universe
this is justice
ENOUGH FUCKING AROUND
we have to change it all NOW
i can't bare the suffering anymore
i can't watch it and go to meetings
and watch it happen some more

i give you 3 months to get your shit together, humanity
then i get wendy all over your ass......
and you won't like that very much

my kids still need to live here
and i can't leave the world like this
for them
i just can't

when i think of you
my bowels moan
my heart sinks
and my teeth hurt

think it's a sign of something?

in my pensive state
i approach the front door
and calmly tell the nice man
to go away
i am done buying
i will sell my soul no longer
this is MY canada
montreal is my litmus test
my beacon of light
my hope for my children
a spineless little worm
or a rebel yell?
we must decide
together

i am never bad
although some might disagree
like my mother, perhaps
wilting away in soggy suffocation
unfortunate as it is
it is not my life
and i am never bad

 

i went back to that river and you weren't there
the pool of dirty water
only showed a reflection of myself

i wonder where you went

 

i remember a day
sucking on a peach pit
and the most important thing
was getting every bit
of succulent peach
off that pit
where did that day go

i am a myth
created to disrupt
you are also a myth
and i am here
to disrupt you

the summer of love
2012
love of self
love of community
love of gorgeous souls
who like to lie in the grass
and watch clouds
as they pass

the summer of change
2012
change in community
change in partnership
change in the way we do it all

the summer of possibility
2012
eyes wide open
not afraid of snapping turtles
ready for what comes next
heart wide open
eyes wide open

the ring of dirt
from your beautiful body
is still in my tub
i am loathe to wash it away
because it reminds me
of what is possible
and everything that is wrong

i am very angry these days
and searching for medicine
but they all run away when
i get too close

searching for a cave
from which i can venture out
and roar occasionally

i can't survive in this reality
please please
help me create a new one
before i die

oh mr policeman
please don't hurt me
i am a nonviolent protester

i am not afraid
i am not afraid

bullies beware
i am not afraid

in the slippery mess of life
i will slide and shake

but never quiver

there once was a girl who had everything
three amazing children
full of life and spirit
and love
a dog who loved her
so much he found his way home
from lake erie
before a stupid cop
made her dad put him to sleep
a beautiful childhood
a good if not somewhat boring marriage
a good if not somewhat boring divorce
incredible encounters with amazing people
the greatest job in the universe
real friends
and lots of them
surrounded by goddesses
fortunate to have enough brain cells left
after highschool
 to study with masters
to learn about breath
but still no one brave enough to sleep beside me

topple the harper regime
make them look for jobs like the rest of us do
bev oda is a token death
not enough, in my opinion
tear down the wall

this world is entirely built on orgasms
that, and thunderstorms
get into one
and then come talk to me

it's bad
it's really really bad
opression is the new fruit loops
make no mistake
be strong, follow love
and come and sit on my porch

standing toe to toe
with the oppressor
i am a rock
impenetratable stone
with a heart that dances wildly
against a hot summer sky
take that, officer burke

i miss the weight of your arm
across my body
as i listen to you breathe in my ear
while i pretend to be asleep

i miss your smile
but mostly your laugh
ok mostly your body
i miss the way you pull me in to you

i am gone in your touch
come home soon

birth is a swift thing


living takes longer



fear is always the truth

that stares us down



we were not afraid to be born

we should not be afraid to fly

in the simmering madness

we hold hands and quiver
worried about stories
ego dances across the room
and i get pushed into a corner

i will not expire
with the solitude of grace
sorry
make me grab this world by its gonads
and shake it out if its misery

i know it hurts
breathe deeply
and take the pain
breathe
breathe
and show your face

i'm the craziest chick i've ever known
and that's on a good day
what if your dad named you wendy
the keeper of the lost fucking boys
how do you think you might turn out?

earth needs sky
i need you
so where is the divide?
there isn't one
that is the answer

you forced my voice
you forced me to speak
i am not willing to die in a world that
doesn't care about its children
wake the fuck up
it's time

in the underground river

that connects each of our hearts

to its source

to the universe

i visit you

but i won't dwell too long

for the current is strong

and i must breathe

i celebrate you this day

like years before us

i celebrate your wings

your gift to soar

gently lift 

your soft cheek to mine

i traverse the earth

carefully laying each step

collecting my tribe

you soar and dip

soar and dip

soar and dip

feet barely touching ground

mesmerise audiences

with your charm

only to soar and dip once more

the river weaves our stories

yet flows past just as fast as they are created

only stones stand in the way

i have a thousand words to say

and yet i have none

perhaps i fancy myself a stone

who always dreamt to fly

who knows why we choose our moment

to come into this world

but you chose this one

in this tumultuous time

and we choose each other 

for the timelessness of our love

i will get better at this

but i can't rush

i don't enter the new like you

she must be very wonderful

to make you fall so hard

and i honour all your choices

although my rebellion speaks other words

i'm sorry but i was born that way

my choice, i suppose

to palpate the duality

of my soul's yearning

today, on the day of your birth

i celebrate this life

with you in my heart

with you in my soul

dancing always

laughing at the mystery

loving each challenge, each choice

honouring the depth of this winding river

that is life

2012

year of radical change

so the mayans say

we feel it in our hearts

our bones release

ancient wisdom

as we create 

something

unimagined

memory leads us forward

into darkness

but the sweet scent of magnolia

tells the way

i have loved you for a thousand years

and i will love you for a thousand more

i saw you in the moon

the very night we met

and i know i will find you there again

the dreadful untangling
of ones own heart
soul's elixer
is joy 

you can't heal
if you don't
have a wound

maybe there's a way
we can run wild
and love each other
anyway

if there is

i want to try

the occupation

is the occupation

of our own souls

our own truth

when the drones sweep the parks clean

they see only crazies, lost, homeless, dirty, pathetic souls

and at first glance they might convince themselves

but a deeper look

shows the beauty 

that we are not crazy

lost souls have been creating their own community

for a very long time

shunned by institutions

hated by institutions

'helped' by institutions

coming together

in hope

in desire

in desperation

in love

determined in spirit

fearless and godless

ready to take on the world

longing for connection

previously denied

the occupy movement

was but a culling

a weeding out

of those who will stand

and those who won't

if you're not one of us

it is you

who is lost

she takes her clothes off
and he leaves the room
not a good start to the night
but maybe the beginning of the book
she always meant to write

always on the outside

of you

finally found some words

to describe the turmoil

in my heart

always on the outside 

of you

you let me get close

but not so close

that i could see the wound

even though my fingers poked at it

even though you scream for it

i'm sorry

we didn't go all the way

with our love

i'm sorry

we didn't leap into the fire

i want to bathe

in an ocean of truth

with you

i want to breathe

into all that is becoming

with you

with me

i want to step off

this massive cliff

with you

.......

in this insanity
when my city dissolves savings
held for the poor, homeless and disabled

to fuel the ego of a pompous, macho
blowhard of a mayor
and instead spends millions to fund
elitist figure skating
and a fancy 3 second light show

in this insanity
when
my local tv news
sells me propaganda and lies
about tasers and cops
while ignoring the real story

in this insanity
when
i am warned by my friends
'be careful what you say'

in this insanity
i stand with clarity
and truth
without fear
and say
NO

what if you saw me drowning
what if you saw my arms flail
as my eyes began to bug out of my face

what if my house was on fire
what if you saw the flesh on my body
sizzle as i screamed

what if i came to your door
bloody, sobbing
and confused

what would you do for me?
what will we do for each other?

it's been a while i know
feeling blocked like an old lady
downing metamucil by the case
except i'm not an old lady
and the block is in my heart
not my ass

but i'll be back soon
i promise

oh glorious moon
full and strong
let me steal a drop of wisdom
dress me in your glory
chain me to the mountaintop
until your message
penetrates
me
show me
show me
your reflection
already reflected
in perfection in my
longing eyes
i bask in beauty of this life 

blast me out of this place
skirt blowing against the wind
face forward
not knowing
make it so and dance with me along the way

in 1492


if i had met columbus

on the boat

i would have hogited the

motherfucker

... and sailed somewhere wam

tied up my boat

shared everthing i had

and danced till i couldn't dance

any more

it seems to me

that what's at stake here

is the very way

we see the storm

you see

it's a much different view

when you're in the eye

when you become the eye

than when you allow your

soul to enter the dance of chaos

that surrounds

swirling in temptation

like a wildly drunken dervish

it seems to me

that the eye

the calm

the perfect balance

is where masculine and feminine

the divine

dances its own steps

where we emanate from

where we're called to

it seems to me

this eye

this eye

is calling

and what if we cast ourselves
as wizards 
of this great stew
what if we unfold 
that which
has never been 
seen

the new moon

wakes and pulls us along
cloaked in
whatever sustains
this emerging
humanity

these are good tears
and this is a good day
sweeping out every corner
mind body soul
dancing
into our
imagined
humanity

this poem is for dee dee

I am the wolf

you wrap your tiny finger around
a lock of my hair
your legs grip my waist
like a vice
your beautiful brown eyes sink
into my own
and your soul says
'i trust you'
i hold you close and tell you

voiceless

'i am the wolf'

your new mama gives you
pretty things
the glasses perched atop your button nose
your old mama couldn't buy
you giggle and serve me tea
but only in the kitchen
dorothy
not on the carpet

but her name is dee dee
dee dee, i cry
'we're using her christian name now'
says the new mama
dee dee giggles
but
no glasses
or pretty dresses
can hide the shadows
of her heart
'where is junior', she asks
'where is my brother?'

i hold her close as i say goodbye
she asks when i'll come again
rain crashes down my cheek
soon, dee dee, soon

as i open my book to record a note
i am the wolf

i see dee dee's mama
alone on the street corner
shivering, shaking
awaiting the next wave of ecstasy
to carry her away
i sit with her and she cries
she cries the stories of a hundred years
she tell what happened at
the mush hole
and the tears
become a puddle at her feet
she cries for all her children
gone to her, forever
she cries for her sisters and aunties
and for the moon
she doesn't know
anymore

the puddle swells into a river
holding each other, the rapids carry us
she cries for her father she never knew and for
the trees and sky and earth
who used to know her name
her tears flow like waterfalls
drenching the earth
in a great flood
she cries for her babies not yet born
and the medicines
she does not have

i hold her tight and we are washed away into the
wildness of her aching soul
and still
still
i am the wolf